"If you smile too much you'll get laugh lines!!!!!" what a horrible curse, to be afraid of having happiness permanently placed onto your body
fantasy characters: “Geez”
me: who the fuck spread Christianity there
Hey, I'm AJ. Teacher, 30, in love with my gf 💙
"If you smile too much you'll get laugh lines!!!!!" what a horrible curse, to be afraid of having happiness permanently placed onto your body
fantasy characters: “Geez”
me: who the fuck spread Christianity there
this two-years-old shitpost just gained a hundred notes who the snickerdoodles dug it up
In moments like this I always fall back on the fact that they also aren’t speaking English because they don’t have England or the many languages and conquering peoples that contributed to the creation of the English language and therefore the work musr be a translation into recognizable terms in our world’s terms. Call that Tolkien Brainrot.
Definitely funnier if you make fantasy explanations though,
Champagne is a wizard who sells bubbly alcohol.
It’s called English because of the original Lish people, all languages start with En here.
French fries are not potatoes they’re roots of the french plant.
Goodbye is now short for ‘good be your eye’ wishing you luck seeing the path ahead.
Jesus Christ is a long dead lich who used to cause everyone problems and we haven’t stopped saying her name when things go wrong.
And that’s the Pratchett approach
[Image: Screencap from Shrek 2; the text, “They don’t even have dental!” was changed to “They don’t even have France!”]
Bugs Bunny could have simply walked into Mordor. He would have shown up at the gates of Mordor in a disguise and been like "Evil volcano inspection unit" and flashed a fake ID badge to the confused orc.
@ebugsdotjpeg do you take suggestions?
cat laziness is so contagious. you'll see your cat flopped on its back in your bed a completely comfy cozy baby and you'll be like. you're right. you make a compelling argument.
Tummies are sexy and so are thick thighs and so is cellulite and so are stretch marks and so are uneven tiddies and so are love handles and
Anonymous asked:
do u have a crush on any of ur mutuals?
badbitch-mel answered:
if you don’t crush on any of your mutuals are you a real tumblr user
*forehead kisses* *tummy kisses* *nose kisses* *neck kisses* *french kisses* *soft kisses* *cheek kisses* *thigh kisses* *kisses* *kisses* *kisses*
heartbreaking: local thing has to leave the house even though it is so tired and sleepy and full of joint pain